There has never been a better time to be gay in the USA. LGBT+ travelers will find lots of places where they can be themselves without thinking twice. Beaches and big cities typically are the most gay-friendly destinations.
Manhattan has loads of great gay bars and clubs, especially in Hells Kitchen, Chelsea and the West Village. A few hours away (by train and ferry) is Fire Island, the sandy gay mecca on Long Island. Other East Coast cities that flaunt it are Boston, Philadelphia, Washington, DC, Massachusetts' Provincetown on Cape Cod and Delaware's Rehoboth Beach. Even Maine brags a gay beach destination: Ogunquit.
In the South, there's always steamy 'Hotlanta,' and Texas gets darn-right gay-friendly in Austin and parts of Houston and Dallas. Florida, Miami and the 'Conch Republic' of Key West support thriving gay communities, though Fort Lauderdale attracts bronzed boys and girls, too. New Orleans has a lively gay scene.
In the Great Lakes region, seek out Chicago and Minneapolis. Further west, you'll find San Francisco, probably the happiest gay city in America. There's also Los Angeles and Las Vegas, where pretty much anything goes. When LA or Vegas gets to be too much, flee to the desert resorts of Palm Springs.
Lastly, for an island idyll, Hawaii is generally gay-friendly, especially in Waikiki.
Most major US cities have a visible and open LGBT+ community that is easy to connect with. Same-sex marriage was legalized nationwide by the US Supreme Court in 2015, and a 2019 Pew Research survey showed a majority of Americans (61%) support same-sex marriage.
The level of acceptance varies nationwide. In some places, there is absolutely no tolerance whatsoever, and in others acceptance is predicated on LGBT+ people not 'flaunting' their sexual preference or identity. Bigotry still exists. In rural areas and conservative enclaves, it's unwise to be openly out, as violence and verbal abuse can sometimes occur. When in doubt, assume locals follow a 'don't ask, don't tell' policy.
The Queerest Places: A Guide to Gay and Lesbian Historic Sites by Paula Martinac is full of juicy details and history, and covers the country. Visit her blog at www.queerestplaces.com.
Advocate (www.advocate.com) Gay-oriented news website reports on business, politics, arts, entertainment and travel.
Damron (www.damron.com) Publishes the classic gay travel guides, but they're advertiser-driven and sometimes outdated.
Gay & Lesbian National Help Center (www.glnh.org) Counseling, information and referrals.
Gay Travel (www.gaytravel.com) Online guides to dozens of US destinations.
National LGBTQ Task Force (www.thetaskforce.org) National activist group's website covers news, politics and current issues.
Out Traveler (www.outtraveler.com) Gay-oriented travel articles.
Purple Roofs (www.purpleroofs.com) Lists gay-owned and gay-friendly B&Bs and hotels.