Hu R. Yu?

I also have a dilemma about names in my Indian family. I married a Singh and am called Mrs. Singh in the western world, but the real family name is Dahiya, the clan name. My husband's brother calls himself Dahiya but his brothers have chosen to be known as Singh. They are not Sikhs (every Sikh is Singh but not every Singh is Sikh), but come from the Punjab where everyone is Singh plus the family name.
My Indonesian friends' names have no relation to the other members of the family, all are completely different. The phone book is a nightmare.

Along the same lines: my grandfather and his brother emigrated from Germany to Palestine in the late 1930s. They had to choose a Hebrew spelling for their German family name. They both traveled separately and first started using their Hebrew name without consulting each other -- they started off with different transliterations. It stayed that way for (I believe) at least a decade -- possibly longer, but in any case long enough for it to involve wives and children using the same name. In the end someone convinced my grandfather's brother that my grandfather's transliteration was the correct one (it eliminates an ambiguity in pronunciation) and now both strands of family use the same spelling. On some old documents, however, there's still the other spelling.

(Sorry - I couldn't resist)

Hu's on First

By James Sherman
(We take you now to the Oval Office.)

George: Condi! Nice to see you. What's happening?

Condi: Sir, I have the report here about the new leader of China.

George: Great. Lay it on me.

Condi: Hu is the new leader of China.

George: That's what I want to know.

Condi: That's what I'm telling you.

George: That's what I'm asking you. Who is the new leader of China?

Condi: Yes.

George: I mean the fellow's name.

Condi: Hu.

George: The guy in China.

Condi: Hu.

George: The new leader of China.

Condi: Hu.

George: The Chinaman!

Condi: Hu is leading China.

George: Now whaddya' asking me for?

Condi: I'm telling you Hu is leading China.

George: Well, I'm asking you. Who is leading China?

Condi: That's the man's name.

George: That's who's name?

Condi: Yes.

George: Will you or will you not tell me the name of the new leader of China?

Condi: Yes, sir.

George: Yassir? Yassir Arafat is in China? I thought he was in the Middle East.

Condi: That's correct.

George: Then who is in China?

Condi: Yes, sir.

George: Yassir is in China?

Condi: No, sir.

George: Then who is?

Condi: Yes, sir.

George: Yassir?

Condi: No, sir.

George: Look, Condi. I need to know the name of the new leader of China. Get me the Secretary General of the U.N. on the phone.

Condi: Kofi?

George: No, thanks.

Condi: You want Kofi?

George: No.

Condi: You don't want Kofi.

George: No. But now that you mention it, I could use a glass of milk. And then get me the U.N.

Condi: Yes, sir.

George: Not Yassir! The guy at the U.N.

Condi: Kofi?

George: Milk! Will you please make the call?

Condi: And call who?

George: Who is the guy at the U.N?

Condi: Hu is the guy in China.

George: Will you stay out of China?!

Condi: Yes, sir.

George: And stay out of the Middle East! Just get me the guy at the U.N.

Condi: Kofi.

George: All right! With cream and two sugars. Now get on the phone.

(Condi picks up the phone.)

Condi: Rice, here.

George: Rice? Good idea. And a couple of egg rolls, too. Maybe we should send some to the guy in China. And the Middle East. Can you get Chinese food in the Middle East?

Plagiarized from the Mighty Carson Art Players, 1982.

Author is credited.
I c&p'd the text for the benefit of people with slow connections.

And, for Shilgia and others, a Hebrew lesson for Passover and beyond. (text)

Chag sameach, or jag sameaj, to all.

VinnyD,

You don't go back far enough. The original play on words was created by Abbot and Costello Who's on First, 1940s.

The later guys just made it political.

Hopefully, I put the link in correctly. If not, check out Abbot and Costello "Who's on First?" on YouTube to see it.

I hope that this link to "Who's on First?" will work; I don't know if you realize it, viaggero, but Thorn Tree won't accept any link that has an apostrophe in it.

Here, Abbott and Costello.

psw, it was Mr. Sherman, not you, that I was accusing of plagiarism.

The Carson thing was obviously based on Who's On First, but that's well enough known to Americans that you can't call it plagiarism, more of a parody or hommage.

Sorry, but the link to the original article doesn't work for me, it says "Access forbidden!, Error 403" Is it because I'm outisde the US? However, regular articles accessed from the home page work just fine...

Anyway, I had the same problem apparently (apparently because I can't read the newspaper article), working for the administration of a German organization in Egypt.

Everyone had lots of names and spelled them any way they wanted (all reasonable transliterations but they never sticked with one version). If I asked them whether they were a Mohammad, a Mohammed, Muhammad, Muhammed, Mohammat, Muhammet, Mohamad, Mohamed, Muhamat or a Muhamet they always answered "any way you like".

It doesn't work like that if you are trying to find them in your data base (everyone also near always listed a different number of "last names"), so in the end I gave up and asked everyone for their cell phone number first (one guy, one cell phone number) and then asked to confirm that the person on the screen matched the person in front of me.

Whenever they filled out visa applications or got plane tickets the mess would start again - "just pick the spelling used on your passport and everything else is fine" didn't seem to be a concept that was easy...

Sorry, but the link to the original article doesn't work for me, it says "Access forbidden!, Error 403" Is it because I'm outisde the US?

It looks like the page has been removed. I'm in the US and get the same error. Here is more or less the same story from a different source.