Salwar kameez

OK, so everything I'm reading says women should dress respectfully, upper arms and upper legs covered, that sort of thing, and a number of websites and the LP recommend wearing a salwar kameez. Yet when I look at catalogues of salwar kameez on the web, most are sleeveless! What's the deal with that?

Is sleeveless OK as long as your torso and legs are covered in something shapeless?

Not all salwar kameez are sleeveless; indeed most definitely have sleeves. They can have all types of sleeve, too - long, short or elbow length.
But why bother? You don't need to wear salwar kameez to be modestly dressed in India. In fact you'd be more comfortable if you didn't as they don't have pockets and the shawl (dupatta) is a real nuisance - it's hot, it falls off and it gets in the way of your day pack. If you do want to wear salwar, you can buy them easily when you arrive.
Classically cut, conservative western-style clothes are quite all right and more practical. Just don't wear anything clinging or revealing: no cleavage, no expanses of flesh, no tight-fitting T-shirts. Imagine you're a missionary on holiday and dress accordingly.
Another alternative is a long-line traditional Indian top (a kurta) worn over a skirt or your own pants. If the top is see-through, wear a lightweight camisole underneath. These items can easily be bought on arrival as long as you are not a big size. If so, you'd better bring your own things.

If you are worried about harassment, note a couple of things: (1) the way you behave is as important as the way you dress; e.g. avoid eye contact with men who stare at you; be wary of conversations with strangers, and so on; and (2) most men who hassle you will be touts who are after your money, not your body.

Cool, I'm not into tight or revealing either. The kurtas look good, quite comfortable.

the consensus i've gotten is that you don't HAVE to wear Salwar Kameez. you might like to, however. i've worn them before and find them very comforable and convenient. not to mention that a lot of my own western clothes don't have pockets, and the dupatta doesn't really get in my way. but they're certainly not mandatory and dressing "modestly" will probably be fine. you can always pick up a few if you feel like your own clothes aren't sufficient.

to answer your original question, if the websites seem to cater to the US (i.e. a US domain, prices listed in $ instead of rupees, shipping domestically, etc.), they probably are more for the American South Asian market, including american-born young women with american sensibilities, for everyday wear in the US, where, obviously, they are used to wearing sleeveless tops and more revealing styles even though they are ethnically Indian.

for another thing, Indian women can get away with wearing slightly more revealing clothing than western women can, because they will blend in better in general, not to mention they know the deal and where that is appropriate and where it isn't. Indian women know how to pull off a sleeveless top without being overly revealing. also, you can apparently get away with tops that are overall "modest", but don't have sleeves. there's a big difference between the sleeveless SK i've seen and the tank tops most american women wear.

oh, and keep in mind that the american concept of "tight and revealing" is a tad more forgiving than the south asian concept of same. for instance a knee-length skirt in the US is considered downright chaste, whereas in india it might reveal more than you'd want. in the US "tight" is spandex. whereas from what i understand in at least some parts of india "tight" is like "visible evidence that you have curves".

Sleeves are better always. Just that you get that funny tan after walking around in the sun in short sleeves.

Me personally, i wouldn't bother with sleeves except if i was going to be in the north in winter. I don't care if indian women can get away with more revealing clothes, Sleeves are hot. And i would resent the fact that indian women aren't expected to wear sleeves while we are (which i don't think is the case actually). Yes, i know its about avoiding harrassment in which case, i would say, cgame's advice is intelligent.

Have you considered getting your SK in india when you arrive and flesh the whole problem out for yourself once there. Less chance of making a mistake. And it will be less expensive also.

Legs and 'frontage' are the things to cover up and you can do this with loose cool western clothing or salwar kameez. If you wear a skirt have it at least to calf length. In the cities a popular choice with young Indian women is jeans and a kurta top - I think jeans are awfully hot in the hot time, so a loose top with loose cotton pants more cool. if you are trvelling in the winter jeans o.k. In the heat, salwar kameez with the drawstring around the waist is cooler than tight belts or elastic. You need not necessarily wear the dupatta (long scarf) - I have seen many young foreign women with salwar kameez and no scarf (which can make you hot) and they look nicely appropriate in Indian culture.

ah, well, how many times have i heard it said that it is "incorrect" to not wear the dupatta. You look "undressed" in indian eyes if you are not wearing it, so no doubt all those foreign women not wearing the dupatta are making yet another faux pas.

You can just drape the scarf so loose that it barely registers with extra warmth.

Salwaar Kameez are very comfortable as they're loose and airy and so easy to put on in the morning. The dupatta gets some getting used to and after a while it doesn't get in the way anymore. Whatever you wear, just follow the guidelines above and you'll be fine. A lot of Indian women in the cities love to wear Western clothes so anything goes as long as it's modest. In more rural areas or when travelling on trains or buses, still to SK with dupatta. Buy your clothes in India - they're super cheap. A good place to start is Fabindia (a bit more pricey but the selection is great). Look at their website to find out shop locations.

Hey thanks, #9 I'll check out that site.

I've got planty of loose draw-string waisted travel pants with hidden pockets, in materials that dry quick and don't need ironing so I reckon a kurta with those will be good. They've done fine service for me in Africa and the Middle East where I had to be even more modestly dressed. S'pose I better get a skirt too, to make it easier to deal with the squat toilets, although I'm really not big on skirts.

Which raises another matter: stillettos don't look so good with this outfit.

I wonder how successful are the usual traveller footwear of teva style shoes. What else would be a good choice? I can't imagine that runners would be much better than stilettos for aesthetics.

speedy, you will feel much more lovely in a SK + D providing you can get some decent fabric to start with. There is lots of synthetic used in India but you should be able to find cotton.

haha, i've actually been asking myself that same question! what is the best shoe to go with a salwar kameez? obviously the traditionalists will say "chappals" or other indian shoes and sandals. but i see plenty of women in SK without traditional shoes -- every bollywood movie i've ever seen, for starters, almost every south asian woman wearing SK in the west, not to mention actual photos from other people's indian vacations. you clearly DO NOT have to wear classically indian shoes with your SK.

but what looks best? the bollywood girls tend to go with heels. that would be "no", for me in india (or ever, really). i've seen a lot of flat sandals, which look nice, but what happens when i'm in Leh, and it starts snowing? i feel like you could find the right kind of sneakers or other comfy and functional shoe. i'm tempted to just stick with my Chuck Taylors, fashion be damned. it could look quite hip, with those slim churidar pants i've seen...

hm. after some thorough research via searching "salwar kameez" in flickr, it seems like sandals, sport, heeled, strappy, functional, or otherwise, are the way to go. though i did see some sneakers, some more attractive than others. slim-lined and minimalist seems to be the rule if you're trying to do a close toed shoe with SK...

When are you going to be in ladakh with the snow? Are you going in the winter? It is unlikely to snow in summer. Its a hot place in summer.

Those churidars, I like the look of them. I reckon I'll get a few to take home. I think they'd work OK with a nice jewelled thong or sandal. Something with a bit of bling but still casual.

In Leh, in snow, for me it's trekking boots and zip leg pants. Period. And thermals underneath.

i'm going at the very tail end of the season, in sept-oct, when it could happen. will it? i don't know. certainly the average lows at that time of year are the kind of temps i'd want close toed shoes for.

It depends on where you're going in India.

Mumbai and Goa are more liberal and I always wear my knee length skirts and a tank, but most other places, even Delhi, are a little more conservative. But don't feel like you HAVE to wear a salwaar kameez. You can wear jeans/trousers/capris with a sleeveless kurta top, or t-shirt and that'll be fine.

People have this total misconception that Indian women must stay covered up from head to toe - or face the consequences! That simply is not true and you might be getting mistaken with Muslim women who wear their burkhas, which often cover everything but there eyes! But that is not the Indian way! Don't forget that we Indian women wear saris, which reveal our midriff, and, depending on how you wear it, our legs! Plus our sari blouses are most often sleeveless and reveal a large portion of our bare backs, depending on the style!

Just don't wear tight clothes and don't show cleavage. Fab India does have a good selection, but just pop into any mall and go into the department store and you'll find a good choice of suits (another word for salwaar kameez). Don't feel pressured to stock up on them before going there though - there's no point in paying all that shipping/handling! Just wear pants or capris with shirts or t-shirts.

The only time you really should be covered, including your head, is when you're visiting a temple.

Please don't typecast us!

yeah that's something I've always wondered at.....especially when I was in Nepal. Having your upper arms uncovered was considered revealing, but having your midriff exposed wasn't?

It's funny, because when I was growing up in Australia in the 70's and 80's, bare midriffs were a big no-no. Lots of swimming pools (the posh ones, not the council ones) and roller skating rinks reserved the right to refuse you entry if you had an exposed midriff.

Capris with a sleeveless kurta is a nice look for hotter weather.

Puja, please tell me, what do Indian women wear churidar with? (on the top half)

speedyturtle- which part of oz did YOU grow up in? I never heard of such things in my neck of the woods. And bikinis was the beach thing in all the fashion magazines, except in the 80s when the maillot was the fashion, but that's fashion not modesty. So are you sure you mean australia?

opopen it ;-) i was in leh in late september. The nights are indeed, quite cool, if not cold, and it rained. It could well snow in Leh in October. I would have clothes more in the line of #15 says above. You will probably not be comfortable in a SK in those conditions. The days were fine but not hot. The weather during september seems to change rapidly from very hot to cool/cold.

Australia....Austria.....I get so confused between them.....

Yes of course I am sure I mean Australia.
Brisbane.
Skateway at Mt Gravatt wouldn't let you in with bare midriffs, and neither would the Acacia Pool at Sunnybank ("heavy petting" also got you thrown out, although I had no idea what that was at the time, I was only a kid)

An indian woman wears a Kurta with the chridar. It depends from person to person whether you want it a little higher than Knees or lower than the knees. Lower than the knees is smart in India as it accentuates the figure. Its generally well fitting till the waist and then it flows downwards or is a little loose to make the leg movements easier.Also contrast colours are poplular. You can hold the chunni (Scarf / Duppata) on single shoulder and let the 2 sides be loose in the front and behind. Hope you can figure this out and is not confusing.

speedyturtle - I would wear a churidaar with an above the knee kurta top (for women it's generally called a kurti). Wearing the tops below the knee is so old-fashioned and traditional! Most young women get above the knee kurtis so they can wear them with jeans too.

Capris and kurtis were a big hit on the runway at India fashion week a couple of years ago and women still pair the two. I love doing it. It's fun, trendy and traditional at the same time. And pairing the outfit with a pair of sandals or flip-flops (called chapals in India), looks good. And heels look just as good with capris if you want to dress up the look.

If you choose to wear a chunni, as S.Karry suggested, you can also wear it around your neck like a scarf, or drape it around your neck so the two ends are hanging down your back. I think it's a bit more trendier and saves the chunni falling from your shoulder every time you bend down.

Hope this helps...

speedyturtle, you can't be serious. I grew up in Brisbane in the 1980s and 90s and bare midriffs were never a problem anywhere. I grew up on the North Side though, so maybe you guys on the South Side were more conservative ;-) You might remember though that bare midriffs weren't exactly in fashion back then.

and now for my tuppence worth on shalwar kameez as a long-time solo woman traveller. . . depends on where you're going. If you're travelling only in well heeled areas and not walking anywhere you should feel perfectly comfortable all of the time in modest western clothing (long skirt, trousers or jeans with a kurta or a blouse with sleeves (mainly for the sunburn)). Of course, if you're going clubbing in Mumbai or Delhi you can whip out your sparkly mini skirt.

However, if you are travelling anywhere touristy and planning on doing anything on foot, including down to the bazaar to buy a packet of biscuits -- and this applies esp[ecially to the North -- you should think about wearing shalwar kameez, or kurta with trousers, and YES you should always wear the dupatta with both. If you're carrying a daypack (totally unneccesary -- I carry a cool Indian cloth shoulder bag with a zip that I sling across my body), you can sling the dupatta forward round your neck like a winter scarf with the ends loose. In other situations you can always use safety pins to hold it in place. No problems.

The main reason to wear shalwar kameez is to deflect male harrassment, and it really does get rid of 90 percent of it -- not all of it, but it is SO worth it. A great tip I got from a friend of mine was to wear spectacles (with clear lenses if you don't need a prescription), as it deflects stares -- or even better sunglasses.

In terms of fashion sense, walking boots or sports shoes look terrible with shalwar kameez. You can buy perfectly sturdy flat sandals that wear comfortably and well, very cheaply from a number of Indian chains. And for the cold weather, flat court shoes, like you might wear to work under a pair of trousers, work perfectly well.

Best idea is just to look around you and see what all the stylish Indian women are wearing.

In terms of Indian fashion chains, I prefer Anokhi (their clothes use British/Australian sizing -- rare for Indian clothes shops), but Fab India is also a staple.

sigh Brownshouse. Yes, as I said before, I am serious. In some places in Brisbane in the '70's and early '80's, there were privately-owned establishments, open to the public (two of which I have named above), which still had strict conditions of entry that reflected the 1950's-type attitudes of the owners of those places. The fact that you can't remember such restrictions is easily explained by presuming that you never went to such places, not that they didn't exist.

a simple full sleeve shirt or a round neck t-shirt on a jean is just fine....you will have a lot of other things to worry.

although it is hot, i suggest good trekking shoes or ankle cuffing shoes as they protect you from all the filth.

wet tissues and pepper spray absoulute essential.

regards
peter

pepper spray???!

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<hr>It's funny, because when I was growing up in Australia in the 70's and 80's, bare midriffs were a big no-no. Lots of swimming pools (the posh ones, not the council ones) and roller skating rinks reserved the right to refuse you entry if you had an exposed midriff.<hr></blockquote>

Turtle, your original comment was grossly misleading. You ought not be surprised that Brownshouse and I are jumping up and down crying "foul".

I fail to see what is "grossly misleading" about the above quote. I even named two establishments that specifically listed that dress code at the gate. Just because you have never been somewhere doesn't mean it doesn't exist.

Yes, you could go out in public with a bare midriff if you liked, there was no law against it (just as I'm sure there is not a specific law against bare arms or tight clothing in public in India). It just comes down to what is / was culturally and socially acceptable at the time. Many establishments in Brisbane at that time had dress standards that excluded (and specifically mentioned) bare midriffs.

Just about everwhere used to look down on thongs too as socially unacceptable footwear but that has been relaxed as well in recent years.

For different reasons speedy. I really don't think the modesty of Indians can be compared with the dress restrictions in australia - which were mostly about a degree of formality and standards, not sexuality. But lets give this up.

sleeveless/short/tight SK is fine in cities or Goa, but frankly I made the mistake of wearing my sleeveless and short-cut SK top (with the baggy pants, but still the tunic ended above the knee) somewhere in rural Maharashtra and got stared at and pinched far more than times when I'd worn a more traditionally cut SK.

You could wear loose, decent-looking, covering Western clothes too, but I've found SKs and saris really do deflect harrassment. Maybe not stares, but certainly harassment.

I've heard of SK tops with capris but since I look awful in capris no matter what, I'm not tempted to try it. Ever.

I really think we are talking about the same thing - just different degrees of what is socially acceptable wear for women in different cultures forms a wide spectrum, and the ideas of "formality and standards" are often societal constructs to "manage" sexuality.
You have the absolute extreme in some Arabic countries where women are expected to be completely covered from head to foot any time they are outside the family home; India's idea of socially acceptable wear for women seems far more relaxed in comparison. There are many countries with even more relaxed ideas, and Australia falls down this spectrum, though by no means at the extreme end. There are countries which are less conservative than Australia when it comes to "public undress". Even though where I live is a resort town, it's interesting how many local people get offended when (mostly European) tourists wander around in the beach carpark in their underwear, or strip naked to get changed. (Don't even mention nude or semi-nude bathing!)

As time passes and as the world (regrettably) becomes more homogeneous, dress standards are changing in many countries across the world. It really wasn't THAT long ago that women in Australia wore neck-to-knee bathing costumes, or worse, weren't allowed to bathe publicly at all during daylight hours.

But yeah, lets give it up.

hell, even as an American I was a bit taken aback a few months ago when my friend from Austria, while we were splitting a room with a Singaporean Chinese (a guy - we're female, but we all needed a room and found a triple), stripped to her thong undies to sleep.

Was totally normal for her. I changed in the bathroom and wore long PJ bottoms and a t-shirt. No thongs or undies around men who aren't my boyfriend.

shudder I grew up in north east Victoria, then as a teenager, Bellingen on the NSW north coast, and for the last 20 years, Brisbane. Never heard of any dress codes other than not being able to get into nightclubs in the early 90's if you were a guy wearing a flannelette shirt. These days it seems to be more acceptable to be wearing whatever you can that's as close as possible to a birthday suit. Personally, I wish somebody would bring back a little more modesty, especially to this part of the country.

I'm travelling to India in November/December and plan to head to Dharamsala and Darjeeling. I had planned to don something more "local", but y'all have made me somewhat self-conscious about wearing hiking boots with a SK. I'm not a fashion follower at he best of times but will do whatever I have to do to make my travellinge experience more pleasant and bearable. I can't imagine that "court shoes" would be very practical walking several kms a day, especially in freezing temperatures. Besides, I don't think my bright purple thick explorer socks would fit into a court shoe.

Have enjoyed reading the debate though, certainly food for thought. I might just see what I can get for above the waist that's also going to keep me warm.

Elinor

yes fotosnapper i am afraid i can't quite see the SK looking too chic in coldweather even if you are not a trendoid. Even a cardigan would ruin the look if you ask me. To my mind, its definitely a more warmer weather dress style. Unfortunately certain locals don't always have any choice. In Leh, there were some ladies who I saw wearing really beautiful plain grey wool shawls. The seemed ok with the SK but i am not sure it would have been enough in Winter (i saw this in late september). But i agree about the court shoes.

I think it would be easier to stick with western dress at that time of year. Even the monks would have a heavier woollen costume.