-
Martuni's
Cozy yet swank, this black-lit piano bar is friendly to both gay and straight. Slip behind the velvet curtains to see who's tinkling the ivories; the piano itself is a copper-topped bar, and the surrounding patrons (of varying ages) all seem to have committed the great Broadway songbook to memory. Elbow-propped, martini in hand, you'll be singing along in no time.
-
Matrixfillmore
One of the (in)famous breeder bars of the Marina, the atmosphere is effervescent with hormones. A well-dressed crowd comes here for cocktails and microbrews, and hopefully a hook-up. A bar menu of charcuterie will satisfy other appetites. Felt walls, wood floors and a fireplace make it especially cozy in the SF fog.
-
Medjool
The view down Mission from above old Mission Theater marquee is quite possibly the best panorama in town that doesn't involve the Golden Gate Bridge. The unfair advantage is that it comes with the option of a mint-packed mojito and tasty Middle Eastern meze platter - don't let the view distract from the baba ghanoush and pita, or it'll be long gone.
-
Mezzanine
With possibly the best sound system in SF, behemoth Mezzanine hosts electrofunk disco, hip-hop artists and classic alt-bands like the Psychedelic Furs to keep you dancing all night.
-
Midnight Sun
When the guy next to you puts down the latest David Sedaris book to tune in to Ugly Betty, you know you're in everyone's second living room. The lofty TV/video bar is a huge draw on American Idol nights, when it's standing-room only. You'll be sure to find something to cheer, groan or gossip about with the pretension-free, dressed-down gay crowd. Drinks are cheap, too.
-
Mighty
In a huge former warehouse sequestered in a no-man's land between SoMa, the Mission and Potrero Hill, Mighty packs a wallop with three long bars, a balcony and an expansive dance floor. Better still, the club books high-caliber DJs (touring and local) and maintains a fun, attitude-free vibe. Easy parking is an added bonus.
-
Mix
Notorious for opening at daily (yes, really), this neighborly little jukebox joint attracts retired queens in the mornings and a mix of low-key gay boys, their straight buddies, and grrl-next-door lesbians in the evenings. With a cool tiki bar patio out back, serious pool tournaments and Wednesday chick nights, it's a good idea to settle in for a few, since everyone seems to end up here.
-
Mock Cafe
Open mic from till is followed by comedy showcases, offering promising up-and-coming comics and seasoned talent. Robin Williams himself has mounted this stage... and we mean that in a good way.
-
Momi Toby's Revolution Café
For once, a café that's not just another Internet port. Check out the bohemian scene, with musicians and artists running the espresso machine and poets scribbling furiously in the corner until the afternoon switchover from coffee to wine by the glass. Take in the sun outdoors, or grab a window seat inside to eavesdrop on first dates while feigning interest in passersby.
-
My Place
Aka My Face, this is a neighborhood standby for pervy men and pinball wizards. Don't be fooled by the recently cleaned-up bathrooms: the place is still a dump. On the plus side, it's got friendly, no-nonsense bartenders, art that looks like X-rated Popeye on the walls and a hidden back patio for smoking.
-
Advertisement
-
Noc Noc
Who's there? Nearsighted graffiti artists, anarchist bike messengers moonlighting as electronica DJs, and other characters straight out of an R Crumb comic, that's who. This place looks like a neolithic nuclear bunker designed by Tim Burton, and serves a sake cocktail that's sure to have you buzzing.
-
Oberlin Dance Collective
If you like your dance risky and raw, you've found your troupe. The ODC's own dance season has run September to December for the past 30+ years, and the ODC Theater offers shows year-round featuring local and international artists. It's a small (corps de ballet is 10) company directed by women. Like the San Francisco Ballet, it also operates a dance school.
-
Orbit Room
A fashionable mixed crowd is attracted to the Orbit Room, a postindustrial art-deco bar. It stays open late and boasts a good jukebox and panoramic windows, and its sidewalk tables make it well suited to lingering over coffee or draught beer. Tuesday nights feature bartender Alberta Straub, who's either a total genius or the meanest cuss on the planet, depending how serious you are about your cocktails.
-
Perry's
At Perry's you might hook up with old money from mansions up the hill, or health-freak hotties just back from a run and freshly showered. A mainstay breeder bar since the '80s, with burgers, pub grub and cocktails.
-
Pied Piper Bar
Deep within the opulent Palace Hotel, the Pied Piper is in a class of its own. Mahogany walls and plush seating are nice enough, but what really sets this place apart is the 1909 Maxfield Parrish mural (kinda creepy-gorgeous, in a handsome con-man way) that hangs over the bar. Prices are steep but include bar munchies, and it's worth stopping by for a single classic martini.
-
Pier 23
It looks kind of like a surf shack from the outside, but this old waterfront restaurant regularly features R&B, reggae, Latin bands, and the occasional jazz piano soloist. It's a casual scene, and on warm evenings it's a treat to step out onto the back patio overlooking the bay. The dinner menu features pier-worthy options like batter-fried oysters and whole roasted crab. The music starts at or , and admission is sometimes free.
-
Plough & The Stars
Rumor has it the owners here are celebrities back in the Emerald Isle, which would explain how they manage to pull in top Celtic talent with little fanfare or advance warning. A little jig is probably unavoidable, but put down your pint first on the long lunchroom tables so as not to splash the new best friends who bought your last round.
-
Pocket Opera Company
The Pocket Opera was founded in 1978 by a local character named Donald Pippin. Pippin translates librettos into English but remains faithful to the original score, and his company performs in halls around the Bay Area from February to June. In San Francisco, performances are at the Florence Gould Theater in the Palace of the Legion of Honor , as well as at the Temple Emanu-El in the Richmond District.
-
Powerhouse
Thursdays through Sundays are best at the Powerhouse, an almost-rough-trade SoMa bar that attracts some leather and S&M men and, apparently, porn stars. Ridiculously cheap beer flows, and tatted, pierced or shirtless guys get drink specials on themed nights. The mirror in the bathroom is very revealingly situated. On the back deck, stoners smoke out and feel each other up.
-
Punch Line
Known for launching promising talent (perhaps you've heard of Robin Williams, Chris Rock, Ellen DeGeneres or David Cross?), this historic standup venue is small enough that you can hear sighs of relief backstage when the comics kill, and teeth grinding when jokes bomb. Toss down your two-drink minimum before the show or during breaks, but be warned: they pack more punch than most of the one-liners.
-
Advertisement
-
Purple Onion
Such legendary comics as Woody Allen and Phyllis Diller clawed their way up from underground at this grotto nightclub. Recently, comics took back the stage from lackluster lounge acts, and the club's been rejuvenated - Robin Williams has even stopped by to test material. Between acts, live music ranges from classic jazz (Maya Angelou once sang here) to Italian ballroom dancing.
-
Red Devil Lounge
The up-and-coming, and formerly famous (think Vanilla Ice and Sugar Hill Gang), play at this cozy club, an intimate spot to catch a show. Your once-fave stars may have lost their luster, but your date will be looking better all the time after a few drinks poured by these serious-business bartenders.
-
Red Poppy Art House
It feels like a house party you've stumbled upon by accident, where performances are still in rehearsal mode. A series of red and blue garages are open to walkers-by, full of music, art and light nibbles. Upon entry you'll be handed a map that lists the garage spaces and who's performing or displaying what and where. If you dig open studios, this is a very cool concept.
-
Red Vic Movie House
Collectively owned and operated for decades, the Red Vic has preserved a funky '70s vibe right down to the dilapidated couch seating and popcorn served in faux-wood snack bowls with optional brewer's yeast. Surfer flicks, punk rockumentaries and movies by local filmmakers pack the place out, so get in line if you hope to avoid the seats with the busted springs goosing you.
-
Redwood Room
This bar recently got a Philippe Starck upgrade, which put trippy 3D moving plasma portraits on the wall to stare you down, raised the drink prices to the double digits and attracted celebrities up from LA with their entourages. The door scene is freakish for a SF bar: straight people dressed to the nines and occasionally tens, waiting patiently behind a velvet rope.
