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Alumbra
Beware the meat-market antics on weekends; during the week it's worth a look for its good music and bar staff and stunning location.
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Arthur's
Go glam at opulent Arthur's. Located down rockin' AC/DC Lane, Arthur's sits incongruously: like teaming a tiara with a tracksuit. Walk the length of the rubbish-bin lined laneway and turn left. Once inside, it's all cartoon colours, brightly upholstered wingback chairs and velvet padded pillars. Arthur's outlandish flair extends to Dirty Disco nights and underground-house tunes. Or tone it down a notch by slipping into the 'secret' back room.
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Back Bar
Chapel St is known for its frontage. So Back Bar makes a refreshing retreat from the all-out-there street. Tucked behind the street frontage of Tusk Café on Chapel St, Back Bar is a cosy evening parlour with lavish décor. Take a spell on a settee and repudiate any knowledge of the outside world till late.
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Blue Bar 330
A narrow and dimly lit sanctum away from the bustle of Chapel St, Blue Bar is a tunnel designed for total liquid salvation. Its linear architecture and street-smart clientele contrast with the sprawl of couches and microwave pizzas further within. Blue Bar debunks the theory that you have to look like a model to drink in Chapel St.
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Bond Bar
With curves in all the right places, this slick basement bar (capacity 500) has every detail covered, from wood furnishings to lush brown and cream tones. Eclectic sounds add a little groove to the swank.
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Borsch, Vodka & Tears
The Iron Curtain has been lovingly replaced with a red velvet one, which keeps Borsch Vodka & Tears dimly lit, intimate and moody. Old Polish posters and heavy recycled materials affect a deliberately faded opulence. The daunting vodka menu - 103 at last count - is no less so when trying to pronounce it: try saying Dziengielowka or Przypalanka krakowska. (The more you have, the easier it gets.)
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Boutique
Lots of hair gel, tans and white teeth get into Boutique's retro-plush opulence. Dappled light from chandeliers, plush booths and lush fabrics adorn a functional fitout. Boutique's Genie Room provides an iota of anonymity for the A List, usually made-up of wannabe celebrities. Fridays are '80s (many hearing it for the first time), Saturdays are glamour.
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Croft Institute
Located in a laneway off a laneway, the lab-themed Croft is a test of drinkers' determination. Prescribe yourself a beaker of house-distilled vodka in the downstairs laboratory and venture up the rickety stairs to inspect the Departments of Male and Female Hygiene (aka the toilets, complete with hospital beds).
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Deco
Why is it that journalists always open the best bars? Here the adventurous and considered wine list is well respected by connoisseurs, but still Deco manages to avoid any inkling of pretension. In the darkness you'll find locals ensconced in couches drinking red wines and eating delicious cheeses, while sports writers nurse Belgian beers and talk football at the bar.
On Friday and Saturday nights the cocktail crowds descend for the driest martinis this side of the Yarra.
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Der Raum
Despite its German name and European influences, Der Raum (the Room) is reminiscent of your classic American-style cocktail bar. It takes drinking seriously, and its cocktails - muddled and mixed to perfection - consistently win praise from industry folk. Croon along to the '50s-inspired musical selection, but don't swing too wide, for this room is cosy.
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Double Happiness
This stylish hole in the wall has no sign, but is a landmark in its own right. Do as the propaganda posters prompt, and strive for a better China - by drinking its alcohol. Try a Tsingtao beer or a clever cocktail, with names like Imperialist Running Dog and incorporating the flavours of the East, such as cardamom or ginger.
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Double O
Make the illuminated 'o' within an 'o' down the end of Sniders Lane your target for sneaker-busting beats till dawn. Downstairs is concrete and exposed plumbing, simply furnished with little hideaway booths for D&Ms. Upstairs is the place to boogie beneath the mirror balls to hip-hop and drum and bass.
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Doulton Bar
Keep your eyes on the prize: a spot at the curved front window with gold-tinted views down the length of Acland St. Wood-panelled walls and weighty wooden furniture merge with a modern split-level floor plan, in keeping with the original building and mindful of its casual late-20s crowd. Who - even from the couches down the back - have their eyes on those window seats.
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Ffour
This stark all-nighter is also popular earlier with Friday after-work drinkers, when entry is free and drinks specials drown out the week that was. It's your basic garden-variety club; each night brings a different crowd-pleasing flavour, from R&B through to commercial house. Join gangs of girlfriends and student types on their big night out.
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Flor
Flor Wine Bar is one of those great places you wonder if you should even tell your friends about - maybe it'd be better to keep it to yourself. It's small, with one cosy corner, a few tables, a courtyard for summer, and a really big wine rack. If wine's not your thing, you can get stuck into one of many fine single malts, or try a whisky flight - 15mL serves of five different whiskies.
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George Public Bar
The imposing George Hotel is a monumental establishment. Behind the crumbling paint and Edwardian windows there's an award-winning restaurant (Melbourne Wine Room) and several bars designed to attract the beautiful people. But in the bowels is the George Public Bar, or Snakepit. Descending into the basement has been likened to walking into the bar scene in Star Wars. Here all types are welcome to nurse a pot, play some pool or eat a counter meal.
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Gin Palace
If you love martinis, then this is your castle. With a drinks list to make your liver quiver, Gin Palace is the perfect place to grab a soft couch or secluded alcove, sip, and take it slow. Its seductive lighting, velvet drapes and cushioned nooks give it a top first-date rating. It's best on weeknights, when a conversation can be conducted without resorting to sign language.
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Great Britain
This big corner pub does the dingy local thing with panache. Noted for its own brand of beer called 'Piss' and a low-alcohol version called 'Piss Weak', there are few other pubs where you can ask for a pot of Piss without anyone batting an eyelid. The GB will even call in a pizza from across the road. This gladly gloomy stalwart livens up later in the week, with a clubby basement - open late.
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Hoohaa Bar
Pressed-metal panels make an impression at this otherwise restrained upstairs bar - a refreshing change from the area's deluge of gimmick and lounge bars. Hoohaa is young and fresh, a popular haunt of students at the nearby circus school and arts uni. Booths, a courtyard and a schmoozing area around the slick bar fill up fast.
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La La Land
When the sun goes down and you're left needing a little liquid rejuvenation, you always have La La, the relaxing land of open fires, snug hand-me-down couches and a limited drinks menu. Nuzzle yourself into a corner with a bottle of wine, a fondue and a friend or two.
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Lambsgo Bar
If you love beer you'll love Lambsgo. Haunt the modest beer garden or pool room and you'll find such treats as Kwak beer, a brew served in a glass with a bulbous bottom so it can't balance without hand or stand; and Delirium Tremens, a high-alcohol beer adorned with pink elephants. And if washing the hops over the chin gets you a little peckish, Lambsgo lets you dial for pizza.
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Last Laugh Comedy Club
The Last Laugh is open Friday and Saturday year-round, with additional nights in summer. This is professional stand-up, featuring local and international artists. Dinner/show packages are available - bookings recommended. The club is also a venue for acts during the Comedy Festival.
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Long Room
What do sushi, moose heads and cocktails have in common? They're all at Long Room. The decadent space runs the length of a city block, and is bedecked with said heads, clusters of low-lying tables, a sushi bar and private tatami rooms. The after-work crowd recognise the top-40 type tunes and loiter till late.
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M.O.O.
This sumptuous hideaway has the air of an exclusive gentlemen's club. Overstuffed leather couches, private booths lining the walls and excellent service complete the picture. It's the perfect place to hold an important conference with friends over several bottles of fine wine - you can also taste your way through a tantalising tapas menu.
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Melbourne Supper Club
Celebrate in style or just indulge for the sake of it. Leave your fur-lined coat at the door and cosy into the leather cushion of a chesterfield. Browse the legendary wine encyclopaedia and allow yourself to be pampered with couch service. Sommeliers will cater to any liquid desire and light-supper requirement.
