Travel etiquette 101: body language

Feb 26, 2011 12:46:15 AM

Robert Reid
Lonely Planet Author

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You step over someone’s legs in Nepal and don’t even realize you’ve committed a grave social taboo! Although most locals will excuse breaches in etiquette, wouldn’t you rather be informed? Read below for a list of etiquette tips, taken from our various guidebooks, to help you navigate different parts of the world.

1. In Asia, never touch any part of someone else’s body with your foot, which is considered the ‘lowest’ part of the body. If you accidentally do this, apologize by touching your hand to the person’s arm and then touching your own head. Don’t point at objects or people with your feet, don’t prop your feet on chairs or tables while sitting. – From the Lonely Planet Thailand travel guide (and other Asia guidebooks)

2. Also in Asia, refrain from touching people on the head or ruffling their hair. The head is spiritually the ‘highest’ part of the body. Don’t sit on pillows meant as headrests, as it is a variant on this taboo. – From the Lonely planet China travel guide

3. Shaking hands was introduced to Fiji in the 19th century by way of Tonga, and quickly became the established custom. An affectionate handshake can be very long, and may even last throughout an entire conversation. – From the Lonely Planet South Pacific Phrasebook

4. In Nepal, it’s bad manners to step over someone’s outstretched legs, so avoid doing that, and move your own legs when someone wants to pass. Also do not step over or sit on a monk’s cushions in or near a temple, even if no one is sitting on them. Always walk around stupas and chortens (Tibetan-style stupas) in a clockwise direction. – From the Lonely Planet Nepal travel guide

5. In Japanese baths, called onsen, always wash first before entering the water. The water is considered fouled if someone does not do this, kind of like the American equivalent of peeing in a pool. Also, use a wash cloth to cover your private bits and pieces. – From the Lonely Planet Japan travel guide. (Also see: Top 10 hot springs in Japan)

6. The people of Italy are emotionally demonstrative, so expect to see lots of cheek kissing among acquaintances, embraces between men who are good friends and lingering handshakes. Italian men may walk arm-in-arm, as may women. Pushing and shoving in busy places is not considered rude, so don’t be offended by it. Try to hold your ground. The Italian body language vocabulary is is quite extensive, but the following six may prove useful when traveling:

Six examples of Italian body language with their matching translations

7. Shaking hands across a threshold is considered unlucky in Russia. An interesting feature of this is that some pizza delivery guys refuse to conduct a transaction across a threshold; you either have to go out to the hall or invite them just inside the door. – From the Lonely Planet Russia travel guide

8. In India it is possible to pay a tremendous compliment with body language alone. When somebody approaches a person with their tongue between their teeth and gathers the air around the person’s head with their hands to draw it into their own personal space, it means they find the person either unbearably beautiful or extraordinarily intelligent. – From Lonely Planet’s Indian English Language & Culture

9. Don’t stick your index finger and middle finger up with the palm of your hand facing towards you in the UK… it’s the equivalent of giving someone the finger. Tip: Don’t order two beers in this fashion in UK bars. Doing it palm facing out is OK (i.e., the peace sign) – From a Lonely Planet staffer in the UK

10. Moroccan greetings can last up to 10 minutes. Shake with your right hand then touch your hand to your heart, to indicate that you’re taking the meeting to heart. Good friends may tack on up to four air kisses, accompanied by a stream of well wishes: ‘How are you? Everything’s good with you? I hope your parents are well? Baraka (blessings) upon them!’ – From Alison Bing, Lonely Planet Morocco author

Know of other body language dos and don’ts around the world? Mime them for us in the comments below.

Also check out:

Travel etiquette 101: food & drink

Potentially offensive travel ads (AOL Travel)

Travel then and now through photos (AOL Travel)

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Comments

1 March 2011 5:38AM dfkid77 Report this comment
A mistake I made several times in Iran through habit was to give a thumbs up. There it is an obscene insult there!
2 March 2011 4:08AM busbuckets Report this comment
In many countries in Africa, such as Senegal, it is considered extremely rude and disrespectful to make eye contact with your elders or authorities.
2 March 2011 1:19PM eurovinh Report this comment
In Asian countries, people tend not to make eye contact and in the U.S., the lack of making eye contact makes you appear as being deceptive.
4 March 2011 4:53AM butterflydiary Report this comment
From what I've heard, in Japan, always the oldest speaks first at a meeting. They're considered gurus or sages and everyone listens to their advice first before offering theirs.
5 March 2011 8:04PM leahmaria Report this comment
#9 is applicable in Australia as well.
16 March 2011 3:21PM budmcginty Report this comment
How true!
The first time I visited New Jersey, I made the mistake of failing to cast dispersions on the mothers of all non-Italian races before dinner was served.
Boy was my face red.
11 April 2011 7:27PM manusardinia Report this comment
Re: Italy, not too sure about the "Vai al diavolo drawing" It does not really looks like it..but I can assure you that you will understand very well when somebody is sending you to hell in Italy! Another thing that could create misunderstanding, for the Brits at least, is the use of the 2 fingers. In Italy means just the number 2 or V for victory..in Great Britain it is not exactly the same! so do not get offended please. Ciao Manu - Blog-Sardinia
11 April 2011 9:12PM desimira Report this comment
I'm from Bulgaria and what you must know about body language here is that shaking your head left-to-right means “yes,” while nodding your head up-and-down means “no.” :)
11 April 2011 10:19PM carolynwould Report this comment
At Dim Sum the other Sunday with friends I learned that knocking lightly on the table (fingers bent making a kneeling posture) means "Thank You" and leaving the tea pot lid open means "I'd like more tea, please'. I said that in Canada we use words and they said that in China gestures are commonly used. It made for a quieter meal, for sure, more efficient and less confusion with trays and trays of food circulating! Yummy!
26 April 2011 7:57AM kobusliferemotely Report this comment
#9 goes for South Africa as well, Great article!
27 April 2011 10:05AM joaop Report this comment
In Portugal, never give a note handwritten with a red ink pen. It is considered an insult. Something like F***y**!
7 May 2011 3:28AM davenportnice Report this comment
The two fingered sign is a remnant from the middle ages when showing your two fingers to the French meant that you were able to use a bow and arrow. The French had said they would cut off these two fingers of all the English archers after their victory at the battle of Agincourt, which of course they lost. Now it means F off, so its advisable not to use it for any other purpose...
8 May 2011 10:23PM vvim Report this comment
Am I allowed to post links? I have made an extra list of body language that you should be aware of in Ghana: http://tinyurl.com/body-ghana
10 May 2011 12:35PM rrrett Report this comment
Just to clarify, the points about Asia are largely inaccurate.
If someone accidentally touched me with their foot, then touched my arm and then their own head, I'd think they were mental. Please do not do this. Asia is a large place, and LP shouldn't lump everything together as "Asia".
Ruffling someone's hair is fine between family/friends (not to random strangers, tho I believe one should refrain from this anywhere in the world in most contexts).
10 May 2011 12:38PM rrrett Report this comment
About the comment on eye contact in Asia, this is untrue as well. It's very important.
All these misconceptions are funny. :)
13 May 2011 7:01AM petersquid Report this comment
In East Africa, always let the oldest person sit down first. If you don't, it's the equivalent of saying, "Screw old people!" Also, in East Africa, the handshake almost always(with men anyways)starts out with a normal shake which transforms into both people with their hands turned upwards while clasped together, thumb over thumb. Sorry, I can't think of a better description. Then it goes back to a regular handshake, at which point it ends. They'll think of you as a peculiar individual if you do not complete this, though, it is not necessary, it's polite.
17 May 2011 12:06PM bottlerocket Report this comment
In parts of Asia - including Burma - it is polite to hold the arm you are extending just at the elbow when you give or receive something.
In Thailand, if you wai (press palms together to your forehead and bow) you must ensure you raise your hands right to your forehead - it is considered rude to briefly wave them about in front of your chest (worse than not bothering at all!). It is not customary to return a wai from a servant (these days a customer service person) or child.
Never shout or be demonstrative in an argument in Thailand (and other SEA countries) - it is considered to cause both you lose face (i.e. your credibility) and the person you are shouting at to lose of face too (making them intransigent and even agrressive), which will only make whatever it is you are upset about turn out for the worse! Be persisent if you must but in a low, calm voice and with a smile.
17 May 2011 12:11PM bottlerocket Report this comment
Oh and for all Australians - walking along the street in your board shorts with the crack of your arse showing and a bottle on bintang/tiger/singha in your mit swearing at the top of your voice and then entering a restaurant with no shirt on and sitting down to order - that rude! Der!
17 May 2011 12:17PM bottlerocket Report this comment
Don't touch a muslim woman who you do not know or offer a handshake to a muslim woman when introduced.
If you are a woman do not touch a buddhist monk.
17 May 2011 12:42PM steamlover Report this comment
Having just returned from a nine-flight trip in Asia, let me add:
Take your damned backpacks off before boarding! I am tired of being banged about the head by ignorant sods.
Don't travel in sleeveless singlets. Shirts with arms help stop your body odour!
I am a frequent traveller and am amazed over the lack of consideration shown by some travellers.
17 May 2011 12:51PM karis12 Report this comment
bottlerocket, there's really no need to generalise and target Australians like you have. If you don't have anything nice to say, don't say anything at all. This is not the venue for you to air your personal thoughts about any particular nationalities.
17 May 2011 12:53PM googlesplat Report this comment
A few tips about the etiquette minefield for women travelling in Syria (these vary according to region)...
I made the mistake of maintaining eye contact when talking with men. I was politely told by a young guy that this was not the done thing.
Also, don't be too public with men. In some areas, being seen with a man who is not your relative or husband is quite scandalous.
Don't sit in the front seat of a taxi. Only hookers do that.
PS grahamwookie, these rules (and those outlined by bottlerocket) aren't imposed by Islam. They're more cultural than religious. If you flout these rules you could get yourself and the woman you disrespect into big trouble.
17 May 2011 1:18PM randomnickname Report this comment
My personal favourite from hand gestures, discovered during a night of international drinking...
A fist with just the pinkie finger extended can mean
- Girlfriend (in Japan)
- I have to piss (India)
- You have a small penis (Australia)
You can see the problems for miscommunication.
17 May 2011 1:35PM cosmopolitanone Report this comment
In Italy it is not uncommon for women who are good friends with each other to kiss on the lips for as long as a couple of minutes when greeting each other even in public. No they are not lesbians but demonstrating their affection for each other. I knew a Russian woman Inga who was taken aback when her Australian girlfriend rejected her request to give her a big fat kiss by saying what do you think I am a lesbian. Because of these misconceptions one of my girlfriends from the north of England would only kiss her girlfriends in private.
I think we have to lighten up here. Oh by the way I am an heterosexual Australian male
17 May 2011 2:43PM redmushroom Report this comment
In the middle east it is rude to sit with one leg crossed over the other, especially if there are older people around.
17 May 2011 6:02PM morealyz Report this comment
#4 is partly applicable in Russia - do not step over any part of other person's body.
17 May 2011 7:48PM nicciolai Report this comment
I've had a few body language breakdowns with Iranian friends and students over the waggling of eyebrows! In New Zealand, we raise the eyebrows to show interest or to give a silent affimative. For Iranians, however, they raise their eyebrows to say 'no.'
17 May 2011 7:51PM nicciolai Report this comment
In New Zealand, #9 is true too. Also, for New Zealand Maori, it is bad manners to step over someone's legs, sit on a pillow, look directly at someone older than you and to touch a person's head. The latter is regarded as Tapu - sacred.
17 May 2011 8:44PM amiejw Report this comment
I lived in Southern Sudan for a while, and while not a travel hotspot, there were a few customs I had to get used to. First, when greeting each other, Sudanese extend their right arms to lightly touch each others shoulders, then exchange handshakes (men and women). Second to know, you must also shake everyone's - and I mean everyone's - hand when entering a room, no matter if there are two or ten people there.
17 May 2011 8:45PM amiejw Report this comment
Also, in most Arab countries I've been to men hold each others hands as do women - it's a sign of friendship and shouldn't be taken as a sign of homosexuality. As for not shaking women's hands in Muslim countries - it's not meant as a sign of disrespect if a man won't shake a woman's hand and vice versa. You shouldn't worry about offending a woman as a man if you extend your arm to shake it. If she chooses not to, she will be politely cover her heart and bow, as will the men. It's simply a customs thing, akin to American men not kissing each other on the cheek... unless of course they're dating!
17 May 2011 8:52PM irondoor Report this comment
Travel etiquette hey? In the country called Gauchefree carrying a Lonely Planet around in public to inflict on innocent fellow travellers is considered a faux pas of surpassing clumsiness.
17 May 2011 8:52PM irondoor Report this comment
Travel etiquette hey? In the country called Gauchefree carrying a Lonely Planet around in public to inflict on innocent fellow travellers is considered a faux pas of surpassing clumsiness.
17 May 2011 9:00PM toshkent Report this comment
Always ensure you are freshly showered with mint fresh breath when meeting Australians and practice speaking with a non-English accent (South African works really well)- oh, and don't mention ashes as it will also offend them greatly.
17 May 2011 9:16PM la_magia Report this comment
Agree with morealyz - #4 is partly applicable in Russia - do not step over any part of other person's body. Also, don’t prop your feet on chairs or tables while sitting, especially in public areas.
17 May 2011 9:20PM kiwi_diver Report this comment
#9 is applicable in New Zealand as well. When driving in NZ remember to indicate when driving, if the police are behind you, you will get a ticket and it´s pretty rude.
Also, most european´s and anyone else, when entering a bar/restaurant and sitting down without notifying anyone is considered rude and you may be sitting there awhile. You may not be apologised to for being made to wait either, and you may think this is rude! You enter the restaurant/bar and make yourself known to the staff if they haven't seen you. They will most likely seat you and bring you menu´s. If you just sit down, other patrons will just laugh at you. Sounds harsh, but it´s true. I see if lots when I dine in at major tourist spots.
17 May 2011 9:41PM srdshelly Report this comment
Isn't "In Asia" a pretty broad generalization when talking about social taboos? Is it really possible that anything applies equally to Japan, Oman and India? I would also observe as a generalization that people are much more forgiving of a visitor who inadvertently makes a mistake than of a member of their own society who "should know better".
17 May 2011 10:22PM ratlike Report this comment
"Italian men may walk arm-in-arm, as may women. "
Teenage girls walk arm in arm. Certainly NOT men. If I saw two men walking arm in arm, I would think they were gay (not that anything is wrong with that, of course).
"Pushing and shoving in busy places is not considered rude, so don’t be offended by it. "
It IS rude! What do you think we are, the third world?? Just because people do that (and other people respond), it doesn't mean it's not rude -_-
@cosmopolitanone
"In Italy it is not uncommon for women who are good friends with each other to kiss on the lips for as long as a couple of minutes when greeting each other even in public."
dunno where you've been but it wasn't Italy or at least it's certainly not common. Again, teenage girls can do that, women can do that as a joke, but certainly it won't last two minutes.
Weird perceptions about my country!
18 May 2011 12:01AM avdij Report this comment
Russia / Ukraine / Belarus: If you pay someone, never put the money straight into the hand of the receiver, instead pay out on the table. Never whistle in a house.
Poland: When entering a room, shake everybody's hand. This is valid even if you've seen them the day before. For instance when entering your workplace in the morning, shake everyone's hand, man or woman.
North Africa and many other Arab countries: Don't use your left hand to touch anyone, it's considered very unhealthy.
18 May 2011 12:21AM moradora46 Report this comment
In Brazil don't use the okay hand gesture where you make a circle with your thumb and forefinger. It means "Go take it in the a**"
18 May 2011 1:39AM ruminyahui Report this comment
What moradora says above applies to many Latin American countries, generalities notwithstanding. You are calling someone a homosexual. Better to express your approval verbally than using a sign.
18 May 2011 3:00AM bernardofsiena Report this comment
In France, greet the store owner or the person who appears to be in charge when you enter and when you leave.
In China, when you hand someone something do so with both hands.
In Cambodia and Borneo, when you greet someone put your hands together as if praying and hold them in front of your chest with your arms straight out to the left and right. Bow your head slightly at the same time.
In Turkey -I think it's Turkey- if you have to blow your nose go into the hall or someplace away from people. That might only apply in restaurants -not sure.
When you go into a Catholic church anywhere in the world, men should remove their hats. Going into a Jewish synagogue? -men need to put on a hat. Before entering a mosque or buddhist temple, everyone should take off their shoes. Women should cover their hair. Want to get into St. Peter's Basilica in Rome? Don't wear shorts or sleeve-less shirts or other tops; it is certain that you won't get in.
18 May 2011 6:47AM rickvaughn71 Report this comment
I had an American coworker in Korea who would always sit in the break room with both feet up on the table. The table was used as a desk by some people and as a dining room table by others. I tried to explain to him that this was considered offensive but he made the point that it was not offensive back home in Texas, so the locals should just "get over it".
18 May 2011 6:22PM palinglambat Report this comment
5) Back to Thailand, I was recently handed an envelope and asked, no, demanded of that I donate for the flood victims in the north, the envelope was opened in my presence and the donation noted down - I thought it was only correct and fitting therefore to hand out envelopes for the victims of the earthquake in Indonesia. 6) In Russia, light up a ciggy as you get off the plane and if anyone tries to stop you, growl loudly and sway backwards and forwards, you could also vomit too if you wish to really blend in.
19 May 2011 8:21AM susanvankoski Report this comment
I don't like the frequent comedic sarcasm and ethnic insults. It's not helpful. This isn't the forum for it. I signed up/subscribed for real practical help. As someone who used to live in India I know the importance of getting things right. So far this forum has been a waste of time.
23 May 2011 7:38PM bvermeulen Report this comment
No one appreciates your sarcasm, palinglambat. I don't come from any of the countries you mentioned, but even I'm offended! If you want to be rude and disrespectful,go do it somewhere else! Attacking people who may be different than you, just shows that you're insecure and unsure about who you are. Grow up.
25 May 2011 2:24PM sampep Report this comment
@petersquid re "In East Africa, always let the oldest person sit down first". Surely that is good manners everywhere. I practise that here in Melbourne.
27 May 2011 5:15PM 83eggs Report this comment
In Mozambique (possibly other African countries?), don't beckon someone with a hooked finger, unless your intention really is what that gestures's used for - to call a prostitute.
6 June 2011 4:16AM bluebubbles32 Report this comment
In Philippines, a simple Hi, Hello, or How are you? accompanied with a smile and eye contact when greeting someone means you're establishing a friendly relationship. A handshake is ok. We kiss cheek to cheek with friends but not with strangers. When in public places, don't sit with your feet up in chairs or tables. Don't smoke in front of someone. When you invite for a meal, movie, etc., the one who did the invite should be the one to pay. When you talk, Filipinos focus on what you're saying and observe your body language. We respect everyone, so we expect respect in return.
28 June 2011 2:03PM anais_b Report this comment
@moradora46 In Chile it's fine to do the okay sign with the fingers, and people understand, but it's getting old fashioned. Now it's also used to mean a** , but we usually can tell which one is it from the face gesture.
Also when I travelled to Japan I discovered that the same okay gesture, but with the palm pointing upwards means money! (very useful when shopping if you don't master the language) while back in Chile the gesture for money is rubbing your index and thumb together (not sure if this applies for other latinamerican countries though!).
13 July 2011 8:14PM mcsound2 Report this comment
When in South East Asia, Thailand, Indonesia, Laos, Cambodia at least, when you want to beckon someone over, you do it the same way as in "the West" but with your palm down. Also it is polite when handing or being handed something if you use your right hand then touch your left hand to your right elbow/forearm at the same time. It is polite in these countries to call people Mr Matt, or Mr Simon etc. ie use someone's first name but preface it with Mr. In Swaziland (possibly other places in Africa too) it is considered the polite thing to do to keep your head lower than the elder in the room. e.g. Even though we were 27 years old, we still sat so that our heads were lower than our friend's father. Obviously not always possible as when you first walk into the room, but the respect is shown when you make the effort to do it.
1 September 2011 11:39AM sungun Report this comment
In Norway please try to remember that most people have extra personal space. If possible we try not sitting next to someone on the bus, someone would rather stand then sit next to someone (and no, not cus the person is smelly or scary, just cus it's weird). When talking to a norwegian that is not your friend/relative try to stand atleast 1 - 1 1/2 meters away if possible. The closer you get, the more closed up they will be. If you're asking for directions you might as well head for the closest shop you see and ask the people working there, because the chance of you actually "getting" a local on the street to stop and help you unless you grab/follow them, is highly unlikely. If someone is alone on the bus with a stroller and you sit close to the exit they will most likely need your help, and the driver will not leave his comfy seat in 99% of the cases, so step up!
29 December 2011 1:05PM Shivah Report this comment
In China its rude to acknowledge any bodily functions. So if someone sneezes or passes gas you're supposed to ignore it. I got a great many giggles for saying "bless you" during winter colds.